i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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