Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
ok first of all what the fuck
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
