me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
