awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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