hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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