did you get engaged???
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Randomize