Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I love having hate sex.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
