Ambien. No doubt about it.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize