Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Princesses don't give blow jobs
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
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