He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
