Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
