Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize