whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
