We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
