I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
