I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
