Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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