You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
There's even glitter on my cock...
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