Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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