normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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