we have officially lost it.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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