The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
