if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Randomize
