Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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