I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
