We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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