Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Randomize