Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Randomize