great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
