Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
