easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
