Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize