school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Randomize
