I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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