you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
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