i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
