Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
