I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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