It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
