So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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