I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
