He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Randomize
