hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
