is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Randomize
