I am puke
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
