just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Randomize
