She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
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