that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
you win again, gameday.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
