Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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