Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Randomize